considerations

everyday we make choices, from the simple ones of buying lunch to ones that could define who we are in the long run.. so wad are we really? every choice we make forms up part of our life.. so i choose to wait.. and if u are reading this, i hope i dun wait in vain and that the truth is i never got over you.. i've considered others, and nearly went into one... although i dun think i can safely say that it would have worked out or it was a mutual thing.. so in other words, wen u read this, if ever, i'm going to wait till i come over and if things and feelings are still the same and if u arent already spoken for, then i am going to try my hardest to win you back.. and this would be the perfect birthday present to myself..

Listen

Listen, I would say, if you had cancer in you body, i'd find all ways to take it from you and put it in mine. Listen, I would say, if some great star fell from the sky, i would cover your body. Listen, I would say, if someone tried to kill you, i would stop the blade with my heart or the bullet with my body. Listen, I would say, if I had the last drop from the fountain of youth that would keep me forever young, I would give it to you so that you never grow old. Listen, I would say, I'll try everything in my power to make you happy, to keep you safe from harm. Listen, I would say, maybe one day you'd give me the chance to once again be your lover and your best friend.

what is evol???

Passion is love. It is pumped from our heart. It is the life energy that circulates through our lives. Love is the strongest human emotion and spirit that most deeply touches and moves us. Our passion — or lack of it — for what we do tells us if we're in the right place. To be passionate about our work, it needs to be moving us ever closer to expressing who we truly are. The more closely who we are is aligned with what we do, the deeper is our passion and commitment. When we love what we do, we never have to work again. We need to do more than just get a job, we need to get a life.

The depth of our commitment determines the length of our persistence in overcoming resistance. The deeper our commitment, the deeper the reservoir of self-discipline and willpower we have to draw from.
And so i write this poem, a dedication to you and who you made me and how i feel when i am with you.


Love isn’t maths or even science
But if it were a number it would be the number two.
It would be the number two because it takes one plus one
And that would mean me plus you
Yet the number two would be the best to describe love
The square root of two would be irrational
And as saying goes, love is blind
But yet at the same time the number 2 can be the devil
It rips everything into half
Tearing apart and putting distant in between
So everyday I thank God for you
I thank that I had a chance to be part of your life
A chance to make you smile
Because when I am with you,
It doesn’t take a genius to tell that you are the world to me
The day you said you think it should be over
Was the day my heart was ripped right apart
And as the doors closed and the curtains called
I said ok hoping you’d turn around and say you made a mistake
Till this day when I am around you I am a stuttering fool
I have close to zero confidence with my words
I can’t look you in the eye even though I know you’d look away
All I can do is pen or rather write this poem
And say that I love you…

One day I’ll regret letting you walk away
Guess it doesn’t help that your family rocks
That your mum thinks highly of me
Your dad trusts me like his own son (I’m only guessing)
Everyday and time you tell me you dunno
That you need time, it eats me inside
Cause all I wanna do is be with you
And if we ever get back again,
I wanna be there for you
Through the highs and lows
To provide the a leaning shoulder
Because like the number 2,
Being with you doubles my portion
It makes me a better man, person
Cause you bring out the best in me
Look pass my flaws and all things ugly
For that I thank you for the 4 most wonderful years
Even the date we got together is a by product of multiples of 2
So wad do you say?
Would you consider being the lyrics to my melody?
Ms Sarah Tan, the one whose worth is more than that compare to the sun

Love Tim

When I die...

hello everyone who reads this blog.. its still under construction... firstly.. last time i blogged i said i was going to score a goal.. thanks be to God who allowed me to score twice... i could have scored another but the ball crashed against the crossbar and came back into play... if that had gone in, it would have been a beauty... cut pass 2 players and did a zidane in between another two and unleashed a tunderbolt with my fave right foot... and then pong... hiyo...

anyway we won 6-1, which is a good thing... hahaha... but as i entitled this post, when i die, i jus wanna let everyone noe tt i've tot abt it... the day i die, u all are not allowed to cry or even sob... u all are not allowed to wear black... i noe its a time for mourning... but i rather u all remember me for the good times we shared... my buddies for secondary sch, u all are suppose to tell jokes about the times we spent together having late night suppers... sarah, u are suppose to tell everyone how happy u are(i'm assuming at the moment... after everyone think i bhb) when u are with me... frens called sad, u all must make sure everyone is happy at the funeral... ironic, but sad u have to cheer everyone up... u all can tok abt the times timo was around, gd or bad, happy... never sad.. hahaha.. as for buried or burned..that i haven concluded... i mean one is going to pollute the place the other is going to just take up space... so ya.. have to carefully consider tt... for poly frens, i think u all should jus come and see my dead body... that would be nice enuff for u... as for the mcmcc... hahaha this is tricky... u guys must stick together more than before... love each other more as well.. for my kids(if i have any, sons i hope) u must tell the everyone how u always beat me at football... how u support MAN UTD to the core cos ur father forced it into u life... hahaha... well so wen i die, i dun wan sadness i wan a celebration... its like a party atmostphere... i noe its going to be hard.. but frens please try... i mean it will be my last ever wish... so i suppose u all sld try to grant it.. thanks..

anyway i have officially found a new favourite player... i had to do some searching... most ppl noe/dunno this, Robbie Fowler is my all time fave player... but now since tt he is going to retire i think, Kaka is my new fave player... u ask me y? cos he is a good christian... secondly he is a good player... i hope to model after him.. now u noe why man u lost to ac... christian vs the red devils... no guess who would win... so yes mr Kaka... u are my role model now... jus dun mess up la.. he is said to be a down to earth man... a humble guy.. which is a good thing... i need to learn to be humble...

lastly... i wanna tell everyone... have fun and be happy.. life happens onli once.. so enjoy it.. forgive people.. it really takes the stress away... hate is jus too energy consuming.. love one another.. smile.. eat gd food... do wadeva it takes to make ur day a great day.. tok to someone u lost touch with.. email a fren jus to say hi.. and dun be ashame to tell someone u love them.. its always good to hear that u are being loved by someone else... I LOVE U MS TAN... so wen i die.. tell everyone u love them for being a fren..

this is sarah

haha.. i kinda like this photo... hahahaha... to everyone who hasnt seen my girlfriend before.. here is ur first glance on how she looks like... so glam... sssssssssooooooooo cccccccccccccccccccccuuuuuuuuuuutttttttttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee hahahaha...

The Youth

Dear God, today i went for youth and i felt really touched... a sense of peace i would say.. i broke down at the back where no one saw... jk was singing the song power of ur love.. i noe i haven been the best of sons lately.. always letting u down and stuff... but yet everyday u look after me in all ur own special way.. i am really touched.. for some one so big, u really have a gentle heart... i mean u cld have jus turned me into salt la... oh well i jus wanna sing this song by lifehouse back and worship u as it really jus explains everything... its entitled everything...

Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you're all I want, You're all I need
You're everything,everything
You're all I want your all I need
You're everything, everything.
You're all I want you're all I need.
You're everything, everything
You're all I want you're all I need, you're everything, everything.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

now moving on... i suppose i have recovered enough from the hurt and the pain that was caused in the church... i jus wanna say sorry to alvin and the rest of the youth leadership... i was running and i should have turned back earlier... its jus that i though i was doing the right thing... releasing for others to step up and do the yth a world of good.. but i was selfish.. i was thinking of myself... going to army wad i justified... but really going to army still can go youth service rite... but no... i decided hmm i going to kick some ball... now i really noe wad God means by putting him first and not have any other Idols... i really am sorry.. oh well... i jus hope i'd be a better example for the rest of the youths... dun follow in my footsteps... after u leave for ur breaks u better come back..

now onto something else... Sarah's mum called me kee kao la... so funny... haha... sorry la auntie... tml i going for my second salem fire match... hope we win again... hopefully i score.. haven been scoring goals recently.. which is kinda upsetting.. i suppos to score many many goals one... whats happening to me?? sigh... score something darn it... football is an easy game to play and score... hahaha.... sigh... its been 4 matches since i last scored.. hopefully tml i shall break this run of games and score goals aplenty tml... Winner... btw sarah tan, ppl are reading this blog and i'm going to make u pai sai by saying i love u and i miss u alot... yay... i did it... hahhaaha... happy studying...

verbal bashing

well i guess a year is a pretty long time to start blogging again... but i guess i have to voice out the stress i have been under... firstly wad has happened in the church recently is sad... really to have the foundations rocked like it was is really shocking... without taking any sides i guess we all have to move on in our own ways.. so if u are reading this blog, i understand your anger, i understand how you feel... but under no circumstances can you lash out your anger... ur entry caused people to be hurt, people you didnt wan to hurt... so rmb always consider your words carefully and think before acting...

now moving on... its been hard to juggle a long dist relationship, i mean seriously... everyday i wake up and pray that she is ok over in aus and that she is happy over there... then i head to work.. which i must say can be boring at times.. but there is one guy who is damn gd at selling stuff la.. some sort of like my new teacher.. always to new trick to learn.. i mean he has worked in the sales line for 10 yrs... so that ought to count for something.. anyway, at work of cos it distracts me on the difficulty of a long dist relationship.. and since she isnt in singapore there is a different kind of commitment in this relationship.. i guess we both have different ways of dealing with the lack of communication, which i must say is the foundation to any strong and growing relationship... i guess i have kept my feelings bottled up... at times i feel lonely and sad, but hey, i channel it into doing things, like going out supper with frens, working and stuff... so nowadays i channel all these loneliness into the church's football outreach program.. and we are training for the competition now... we ya i noe FOOTBALL, who wld have guess... and everytime i play i wish you were there watching me fly... cos there are just a few things that put a smile upon my face... u, football and well food... esp gd food...

tried the summer house donuts already and it was crap... haha sorry but compared to donut factory, this one is really hopeless.. but the good part is that there is no freaking que.. but then again sucky is sucky.. oh well..